Tip of My Iceberg

photo courtesy of Liana Mikah on Unsplash

Yesterday was Mother’s Day, a holiday set aside to honor and celebrate mothers. I’m not down on this holiday; I’ve been a mom for quite some time. It is, however, one of those awkward yet deeply appreciated holidays. We’ve all gotten here the same way. We’ve all been birthed; we’re all a result of pregnancy. As great as modern technology is, we’ve not yet cloned a child nor artificially generated a human.

Moms play a significant role in their children’s lives. Whether it’s a biological mom, a guardian, or an adoptive parent, the need for bonding with this caregiver is significant. We learn to attach from those we first come in contact with, which is often our mothers.

Not all women will be or can be mothers. Not all mothers can be categorized as good mothers. But we all have one, and those mothers are part of our greater story, a story God has known from before time. Each of us has been created in love, a work of art at the hand of the Master Designer. Our parents are part of our story intentionally, for they are used by the Lord to help shape us into the people He knows we can be. “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” Ephesians 2:10.

It doesn’t always seem right or fair, however, that some people have wonderful mothers and others don’t. I have friends who grew up without mothers, and their struggle was in lacking the nurturing they didn’t receive as children. In every instance, these individuals grew to be nurturing and compassionate toward the needs of others.

I have friends whose mothers were hard on them growing up, distant, and intolerant of hard emotions. Yet these people have grown to care for and attune to others, giving to others what they never received as children.

How is this possible?

Our stories are epic. The really excellent stories worth remembering have heroes, villains, daring escapes, seemingly impossible challenges, and a variety of characters whose lives interweave with that of the protagonist. Epic stories don’t begin with “Once upon a time” and immediately end with “happily ever after”. The good tales have plot twists that we never see coming.

And God is co-authoring our stories. He provides what we need, so even if our upbringing felt lacking, the Lord meets us where we need Him most.

The apostle Paul spoke of the love of our Father. “Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep His love is.” Ephesians 3:17b-18. We can’t run out of His love, use it up, or frustrate Him so much that He would take that love away.

God understands our pain better than any other person could. “He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.” Psalm 147:3. We may not have had a mom who kissed our pain away, but God is present with us who are His, no matter what we’re going through. Present in our pain. Sharing it with us.

Our moms are characters in each of our stories, and they play different roles.

There is no story without a mom. God created a specific way for us to come into the world; that hasn’t changed since the beginning of time.

But the nurturing we all need, whether or not we received it from mom, is freely given to us by the One who loves us more than we can imagine.