Tip of My Iceberg

It’s all because of the bands.

No instruments involved. These were rain bands from post-tropical cyclone Nestor.

I didn’t even know there was a cyclone Nestor. But his angry, thrashing rain made driving almost impossible.

And I was just riding.

My daughter and I were heading to a gathering early on Saturday. I graciously turned the keys over to her so she could drive. She was willing–though she really didn’t like driving in the rain.

Riding with my driving would have been worse.

The rain came and went for most of the day. Downpours followed by sprinkles followed by renewed cloudbursts.

Wet makes one weary.

I’d had tentative plans, but those were washed away. So my daughter and I returned home and confronted the things that had to be done.

Cleaning.

I’ve never made a claim to be a domestic goddess, a careful caretaker of home and hearth. I’ve loved how my kids have decorated my spaces in ways I’d never have thought of.

Cleaning of said spaces is always an issue. Dirt and clutter happen.

We tackled the cleaning. It was easier doing it with someone else who had the same goal as I did–declutter and de-mess.

We then hit the space where things had been stacked to peruse when time permitted. Things to be given away; things to be pitched.

She grinned at me and started in. I stood and watched for a moment.

“You’re going to help, right?”

I really didn’t want to.

I’m no packrat, but I do have a struggle throwing things away that might be useful. Someday. I’m no Marie Kondo, the gal who says if it doesn’t give me pleasure, get rid of it.

I’m not sure what gives me pleasure. Usefulness is a value. Someone in our family could possibly find a need for this. Someday.

Does that equal pleasure?

Feeling a bit guilted into helping, I dug in.

And questioned everything,

Some of these things haven’t been seen in years. Much of it was unidentifiable as to which family member had owned it.

It was still hard to let things go. Even when they had no value for me.

There are so many things in my life I hold onto that don’t add to my life at all. Habits that undermine great intentions; attitudes of entitlement that add arrogance to my demands; things I take on that I don’t need to be doing just because I want someone to like me.

So few things in life really matter. Family, friends, character.

Most importantly, do I know Jesus?

None of the things of life I hold onto will impact my eternity. Except God. A lot of things I’d just as soon hide, things I don’t want others to know about me.

God knows it all. And still loves me because I’m His.

I need to do some soul cleaning every now and then to make sure I’m not hanging onto things that can destroy me–grudges, anger, regret, despair. Those are things that will mess up my life quickly.

They don’t go away unless I deal with them.

What would it take to engage with your own soul cleaning?

No blame is necessary.