“Did you order them from overseas?”
“Not unless you count Ohio as overseas.”
We’ve got a semi-tradition of having matching pajamas to wear Christmas morning when the kids are in town to celebrate. It’s only semi because we’ve done it just one year. Not everyone was here this year.
This had been planned. Instead of waiting until the last moment, as I do so well, my daughter had ordered these PJs at the end of November. Before Thanksgiving. Cute union suits with drop seats. The little guys would look adorable. The older grands would have been thoroughly embarrassed.
Two days before Christmas, she found out they were in China.
It made no sense how a shipment bound for Florida could end up in East Asia.
Does life ever make sense?
Needless to say, the anticipated jammies didn’t make it.
The disappointment came, however, not because of the lack of night apparel. We actually found some decent substitutes that looked great on the little guys. And the big guys were able to wear soccer shorts and old tee shirts. The gals found red striped pajamas for those of us who are older and red and black plaid for the younger girls.
Disappointment accompanied the plan that derailed. The unfulfilled expectation of something that sounded fabulous with Plan A; the need for Plan B was a letdown.
The Christmas morning pictures turned out well. No one would have known anything was amiss unless someone brought it up.
Seriously, who is going to get their knickers in a wad over something so small?
That’s just it. The big things that are challenging and push us to lean into faith are often easier to deal with than the small things that annoy. The big things can be risky, and when they don’t work out, I’m often not shocked. I’ll try again.
The small matters that should roll off my back like water off a duck are the things that undermine my confidence and joy. Bothersome. Made even more so because I don’t handle such situations well. I act as if I should get a pass on the tiny frustrations because I am willing to trust God with the big stuff.
Am I though?
The reflection of my true character is how I act when no one is looking. When I’m not “play acting” or trying to impress.
God is with me always. As His child, there’s never a time when He turns away from me–even when I’m not feeling too friendly toward Him at the moment.
He sees past the playacting, past the attempts at impressing, past the masks that I wear.
He sees me as I am. Accepts me where I am.
So why do I get my knickers in a wad?
Because I live in my stuff. I’m affected by who and what’s around me. And I often can’t see past the moment to the hope.
Because He knows all, with Him there is no Plan B.
I need to unwad those knickers.