There’s a busyness of life that catches up with me on a regular basis.
Don’t get me wrong. I love being busy. I’ve been told for years that I’m not good at relaxing. Or slowing down. I’d always figured as long as I could live full out, full on, I’d rest when I couldn’t move at full throttle.
Lately, with the demands of life and people–my own choosing on every front–I find my get-up-and-go has abandoned me. Left me with watching-it-fade-and-not-coming-back.
The weather has turned cold and rainy here in Colorado. It’s typical of what we experience in Orlando in January. For about a week. I know it will change, but this is sniffles climate. Everyone around us seems to be getting sick. Or trying to get well. My nose has been on a mission to produce as much snot as possible in record-breaking time. Unpleasant drainage at best.
Add to this the main emphasis of our summer training beginning next week, and it feels exhausting.
My typical morning routine, which includes brisk walking around beautiful scenery, has been the fodder for an on-going argument with my whiney self.
“Get it together, Rogers, and put on those walking shoes. The day isn’t getting any younger.”
Sigh. “It’s cold outside. And drizzly. I’m tired. My body aches. I need a day off. I’ll appreciate it more tomorrow.”
Stern mental look. “You give in once, you’ll just give in again. Stop whining and complaining and get moving.”
Bigger sigh. “I don’t wanna.”
Angry mental expression. “You wimp. You’re a quitter.”
Biggest sigh. “Fine. I’m a quitter. I can live with that.”
And so it goes.
It’s a toss-up who wins on any given day. The driven me. Or the downer me.
Reality is we all get tired. Physical exhaustion is only part of it. I find for me that if I’m emotionally engaged in an issue, that can sap more strength than being physically active. The mind and heart working in conjunction to solve a problem or help a friend can deplete my energy and leave me with no reserve.
In a take on the Snickers’ commercial, you’re not you when you’re tired.
No one can move through life without a break. Constant motion isn’t sustainable.
God gets that.
In relationship with Him, I have His power and strength to persevere. To push through when the going gets tough.
“He (God) gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless. Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:29-31
This doesn’t mean I’m not responsible for making time to rest. To regroup when I’m weary.
It does mean that the One who never becomes tired is at work in me. Always. To help me finish well. Hoping in Him pushes me beyond my complaints to see the possibilities of being renewed, inside and out, by a force greater than me.
Soaring rather than stumbling.
Take that, whiney self.
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