And sometimes change just bites you in the bum.
I’m somewhere in between the last two. Things need to change, but I’ll be sporting those teeth marks for a bit.
My baby’s growing up.
This isn’t a surprise. I’ve not been Rip van Winkling it, I’ve not missed the reality of her maturing. I’ve been engaged, like the committed mom that I am. (I am committed or do I need to be committed? I never get that one right.)
Seeing her boxes and suitcases strewn all over the family room brought me up short.
She’s beginning her final year of college.
Lest you think I’m a newbie at this, I’ve been through it five times before. Five times I watched my older children pack up and prepare for their last year of parental-supported schooling. Five times I’ve seen change happen. A little growing up. A little growing wild. A little adventuresome.
The other five have grown up and have fully (or almost fully) embraced their adulthood. They’ve owned their lives with responsibility, as much as any of us do. We’ve given them wings–or at least have helped them unfurl theirs a little better.
There’s been something very comfortable, though, about still having one that needs a little more mothering. A little more of those kid skills I’ve been honing all these years. A little more of me.
When did this become all about me?
When I realized that I’m comfortable with the way I’ve crafted my comfortable life.
Comfort really doesn’t define life. It’s something we try to achieve by adding things or doing things or trying to control things.
Change is a better descriptor of life. And change is a challenge. And challenges can be, most definitely, uncomfortable.
Change can mean good things. But it can also mean pain, loss, grief, heartache. It can bring out the best in me. Or it can drag me down into a dark hole that seems inescapable.
God knows that change is life. He’s the ultimate Author of change. He changed our downward spiral into darkness to hope when He sent His own Son to pay the price for our darkness. His change is the price He paid for our lives.
“We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems (change) and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because He has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with His love.” Romans 5:3-5
There will always be things that rock my world. Debbie’s last year of college is just a reminder of how little control I have over the things that impact my life.
But if I can come out on the other end of change a little bit more mature, a little bit wiser, a little stronger in character, then maybe comfort isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be.