Tip of My Iceberg

‘Tis the season for graduations and other spectacular endings, when people finish and are able to close a door on a particular chapter of their lives and anticipate what new things await them.

We were invited to a dear friend’s college graduation party, an opportunity to celebrate the hard work and energy he’s invested in getting his business degree. I’ve known this young man since he was in diapers–not anything you reminisce about at a party, but it put many things in context for me.

People were exuberant with their congratulations and well wishes. They understood Rich was the reason for the gathering.

That was totally lost on Kolly, who at two years of age, sees herself at the center of everyone’s universe. This is a typical response for this age, but it made it even more fun that we were enjoying the celebration at the beautiful home of friends of Rich’s mom and dad.

Kolly couldn’t get enough of all there was to see.

Between the flowers and the lake, she was running from place to place, soaking it all in. Kolly was delighted with the beauty of the place and with the attention of all the people who saw a cute little girl, grinning and going non-stop from group to group saying “hi”.

Little children can be quite taken with themselves. Particularly when they get attention from many people. It’s not a bad thing; we encourage children with our words and our actions. We want those we love to have confidence to be the best they can be.

What happens, however, is we’re driven by likes and clicks and believing what others say about us is more important than who we really are. We make more of ourselves because we want to be more in the eyes of the world than we think we are.

This is nothing new. We all yearn to be seen and known by others.

What happens is that the shadow side of this longing is a sense of cockiness, that what we think and how we act is the best possible response. We do what we do to be recognized, not necessarily to help others.

There was a group of people in Jesus’ day that epitomized this longing for adulation and recognition–the religious leaders, Pharisees and Sadducees. They wanted to be the center of attention, and they dressed and acted the part. They chose what they’d put forth as truth, and if they didn’t agree with something, they did everything they could to dismiss it.

Jesus was the One they harbored the most anger and disrespect for. They didn’t agree with Him because He spoke the truth which showed them to be less than what they wanted to be seen as. But even from the cross, He prayed for their forgiveness.

We need to see one another as worthy of respect, treating one another with kindness.

“Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.” Philippians 2:3-4

It’s one thing for Kolly to believe she’s the center of her universe. She’s well-loved and treated with kindness. But this isn’t an attitude her parents will encourage as she gets older.

We’re all part of a much bigger picture. To ignore that is to miss out on experiencing amazing people and opportunities. We need to see ourselves as part of a whole.

We’re all here by God’s grace and the help of others.

Understanding that is the right thing to do.